Romance Books

His Banana by Penelope Bloom

his banana

 

Title: His Banana
Author: Penelope Bloom
Rating: 2 stars
Genre: Romance
Where I got it: Kindle Unlimited

Goodreads Summary

My new boss likes rules, but there’s one nobody dares to break…
No touching his banana.
Seriously. The guy is like a potassium addict.
Of course, I touched it.
If you want to get technical, I actually put it in my mouth.
I chewed it up, too… I even swallowed.
I know. Bad, bad, girl.
Then I saw him, and believe it or not, choking on a guy’s banana does not make the best first impression.

I should backtrack a little here. Before I ever touched a billionaire’s banana, I got my first real assignment as a business reporter. This wasn’t the same old bottom-of-the-barrel assignment I always got. I wasn’t going to interview a garbage man about his favorite routes or write a piece on how picking up dog poop from people’s yards is the next big thing.

Nope. None of the above, thank you very much.

This was my big break. My chance to prove I wasn’t a bumbling, clumsy, accident-prone walking disaster. I was infiltrating Galleon Enterprises to follow up on suspicions of corruption.

Cue the James Bond music.

I could do this. All I had to do was land the position as an intern and nail my interview with Bruce Chamberson.

Forget the fact that he looked like somebody carved him out of liquid female desire, then sprinkled on some “makes men question their sexuality” for good measure. I needed to make this work. No accidents. No disasters. No clumsiness. All I needed to do was hold it together for less than an hour.

Fast forward to the conference room before the interview, and that’s where you would find me with a banana in my hand. A banana that literally had his name on it in big, black sharpie. It was a few seconds later when he walked in and caught me yellow-handed. A few seconds after that was when he hired me.

Yeah. I know. It didn’t seem like a good sign to me, either.

Review

When I read the summary of this book, I thought it was a romantic comedy and I’d be rolling around laughing. Sadly, that was not the case.

His Banana features Bruce Chamberson, millionaire owner of Galleon Enterprises, a firm who does some web stuff (I didn’t really understand it). Natasha is a reporter at a business magazine who has been tasked with going undercover to find “dirt” on Bruce.

Bruce’s firm is hiring interns, and Natasha sees this as the perfect way in the door. When Natasha goes in for her interview, she’s waiting in the break room and spies a banana, and decides to eat it. Turns out it’s Bruce’s banana – and his name is written on it in Sharpie (obsessive much). He about blows a gasket when he sees Natasha eating his banana, and he hires her on the spot to torment her.

There are so many problems with this book. Let me give you a few of them:

  • A billionaire who hires a woman to torment her? Really? I found this so ridiculous. He hired her on the spot for eating his banana. Who in the hell does that? I’d be a little afraid of someone like that, to be honest.
  • The storyline revolving Natasha’s brother was very bizarre. A thirty year old loser who can’t keep a job. It was unnecessary and took away from the story.
  • The storyline revolving Bruce’s ex. Not at all believable.
  • The “dirt” on Bruce. The reasoning behind was so poorly written. Not at all believable.
  • How quickly and neatly Bruce forgave Natasha when he discovered she was a reporter.
  • The fact that Natasha didn’t do any actual reporting or investigating when she worked at Galleon. She just worked as Bruce’s intern.
  • Bruce clearly had issues with his parents. He met them once and it was never addressed again.
  • The way Bruce treated Natasha.

I could go on and on. This story just had way too many storylines going on and it didn’t really keep my interest. The story also had two epilogues (which you know I love) but they didn’t provide closure.

Bruce was just not relatable, and Natasha felt more like a doormat. I would say pass on this book.

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